Love-and-sex

How to Get Through the Breakup

When a relationship comes to an end, the result can be immensely painful. You might feel the urge to stay inside, curl up in bed, and eat until you're sick--and it should go without saying that this is a bad reaction. While it might hide the pain, it won't make you feel any better and it won't actually fix your love life.

If you want to mend yourself after a breakup, you should put the following steps into practice.

1. Accept the breakup. It might seem like the easiest step, but it can also be the hardest thing to handle, especially if you're not the one who suggested the breakup. Trying to deny or rationalize what happened will only make you fixate on the event rather than find a way of moving forward. As a person, you should be able to define yourself outside of a relationship with someone else.

2. Take good care of yourself. We all know the cliché of the brokenhearted woman who fills herself up on a quart of ice cream. The truth is that you won't be helping your self-esteem with that kind of thinking. Instead of turning to junk food or other unhealthy substances, you should take care with what you eat and drink. The same goes for exercise, which is also a great way for working off stress and might give you the endorphin buzz you need to feel a little better.

3. Talk to someone. Go to someone you trust--whether it's a relative, a coworker, or a close friend--and talk about what happened and what you're feeling. Talk about what you liked in the relationship, what you miss most, and what hurts to think about. A little empathy and an open ear can do wonders for your self-esteem.

4. Explore your feelings. Don't ignore what you're feeling inside or try to brush it off. If you're mad, then get mad. If you're sad, then be sad. Examine why you feel this way and where these feelings might take you. If it helps, you can always write out your feelings in a journal, which you can reread later to give yourself some emotional clarity.

5. Develop new interests or hobbies. Before you start thinking about your current love life and whether or not you want to get into another relationship, spend some time doing something for yourself. Go somewhere fun with your friends. Take a vacation. Learn a new skill, like playing a musical instrument. Once you're out of a relationship, you should focus on developing yourself as an independent person to the fullest.

Image by Nadir Hashmi on Flickr

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